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	<title>Steal This Idea - Articles on Product Vision, Innovation and Design &#187; Humor</title>
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	<description>Philip Haine&#039;s articles on Product Vision, Innovation and Design</description>
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		<title>The Network Heater</title>
		<link>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/the-network-heater/</link>
		<comments>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/the-network-heater/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Wed, 30 Sep 2009 06:56:54 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip Haine</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Commentary]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Product Vision & Strategy]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Research Topics]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Visions to Steal]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[cloud computing]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[crazy enough to work]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[heaters]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[SaaS]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stealthisidea.com/?p=862</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[If you need to generate all that heat anyway, why not do something useful in the process?]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>We&#8217;ve entered a world where computationally-intense tasks can be offloaded to the cloud.  Why build out and manage a computing farm when you can just ask Amazon to do it for you?  Heavy duty computing is becoming just another utility.</p>
<p>That &#8220;cloud&#8221; is actually made up of racks and racks of servers. Those servers are not actually in the clouds, where it is quite cold, but down on the earth, where it&#8217;s warm and getting warmer.  Those racks of servers generate heaps of thermal energy, which requires yet more energy to keep cool.  Otherwise they melt onto one another like Hersheys in the glovebox.</p>
<p>The software architecture that makes these clouds of servers work is modular, and fault-tolerant and distributed.  They allow plug-and-play expansion when more capacity is needed.  They are built to withstand any node failing (with thousands of servers, several will break down every day).</p>
<p>And those nodes can be anywhere, since everything is connected.  But given a choice, it&#8217;s preferable to put them close to where they are needed, because things are faster that way.</p>
<p>The purpose of a space heater is to generate heat.  Heaters are pretty dumb.  That&#8217;s all they do.  They have an electric heating element, maybe some oil to circulate through and some fins to radiate the heat, a thermostat and that&#8217;s it.</p>
<p>What if a space heater instead had a bunch of cheap, older generation, heat-generating CPUs and a wireless connection?  You could crank up the number of processors and their clock speed for a nice cozy hearth, or turn them down a few GHz if you just needed to keep your nose from freezing overnight.</p>
<p>The cloud computing companies could even give you a few cents for each MIPS-hour your heater burns.</p>
<p>At a larger scale, an entire office floor could have computers built into its HVAC system.  Even our desktop computers could be enlisted for the job.  They are ridiculously overpowered for what we need them for most of the time anyway.  The building&#8217;s climate control system could instruct all those idle CPUs to do something productive with their downtime, while warming the office in the winter.  Those computers could even monitor the local temperature and provide more heat where it is most needed.</p>
<p>All of this would:</p>
<ul>
<li>do something productive in the process of heating your home or office</li>
<li>reduce the cost of cooling servers</li>
<li>distribute computing closer to where it is needed</li>
<li>maybe control temperature in a breezy office to a finer degree</li>
<li>maybe subsidize heating costs by donating cycles to the cloud</li>
</ul>
<p>My wife, tactfully: &#8220;I think you have an idea that is ahead of its time.&#8221;</p>
<p>Yes, it could be a while before this idea is stolen.  <em>[This would be a fun and compelling </em><strong><em>research project</em></strong><em> for some engineering &amp; system design students.  Anyone?]</em></p>
<p>&#8212;</p>
<p><em>Philip Haine is principal of <a href="http://productvision.com/">Product Vision Associates</a>, an innovation consultancy that helps guide product leaders and their teams to generate ideas even more important than the Network Heater.  To follow him on Twitter <a href="http://twitter.com/dphaine">click here</a>.</em></p>
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		<title>Farewell, Patelco!</title>
		<link>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/farewell-patelco/</link>
		<comments>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/farewell-patelco/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Thu, 14 Feb 2008 03:40:03 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip Haine</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Critique]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stealthisidea.com/articles/bye-patelco/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[Look in the mirror, Patelco.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<div style="padding: 10px 0pt 10px 15px; float: right; width: 350px;"><img src="/wp-content/bye-patelco/patelco-UI.png" alt="Ugly old Patelco user interface" width="350" height="272" /></p>
<p class="imagecaption">Look in the mirror, Patelco.</p>
</div>
<p><em>[Cross-posted from <a href="http://kpao.org/">KPAO.org</a>]</em></p>
<p>Dear <a href="http://patelco.org/">Patelco</a>,</p>
<p>You and I have been together a long time. Over fifteen years! I have nostalgic feelings for you. I know you so well. I haven&#8217;t had to deprive you of my warm wallet to make a gadget purchase in years. So etched in my brain are your sixteen rhythmic digits.</p>
<p>I took pride in my loyalty to you. I felt special knowing that not just anyone could be a part of you. You were not just a bank and I was not just a customer. No, you were a credit union, and I was a <em>member</em>. I belonged to you. I was special and we both know why: because 15 years ago I was once part of Pacific Bell or a company that had an arrangement with you.</p>
<p>And yet I was not an ordinary member. I was, literally, a &#8220;loyal household&#8221; member. I believe this entitled me to a twenty-five basis point reduction in interest rates. I thought, &#8220;stay close, Patelco! Someday I might need that boost!&#8221; But my credit was true, and my need for your generous gift never did arise.</p>
<p>And, I confess, my heart wandered&#8230; over to <a href="http://www.bankrate.com/">bankrate.com</a>, that sweltering morass of mortgages, CDs and, yes, other credit cards. There were others out there willing to give me even better rates should I ever need them in a bleak moment of fiscal challenge.</p>
<p>But, Patelco, that is not the reason for my discontent. The truth is, it&#8217;s not you, Patelco, it&#8217;s me. We&#8217;ve grown apart.</p>
<p>When we first met I was satisfied retyping the transactions you sent me by mail into Quicken. When you offered a way of downloading transactions online via <a href="http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/QIF">QIF files</a>, I was first in line. Yes, it was quirky and error-prone, but a revelation compared with manual data entry. I had only to spend ten minutes per account each month providing categories for each of your transactions. Those were crazy, exciting times.</p>
<p>But then my other credit cards &#8212; yes, there were others &#8212; started giving me more. They gave me <strong>direct connection from within Quicken</strong>, so downloads happen in one step! They were smart enough not to blindly duplicate transactions if accidentally overlap dates with what I already downloaded. They knew which accounts the transactions belong to, so I don&#8217;t have to tell them. They even <strong>assigned reasonable categories</strong> for me automatically, saving me a lot of tedium.</p>
<p>Patelco, you need to know that this has been going on for years. Look around: QIF is way out of style. I am busier these days, and I just don&#8217;t have the time to spend with you categorizing transactions.</p>
<p>(Yes, things are on the rocks between me and <a href="http://www.versiontracker.com/dyn/moreinfo/macosx/27738">Quicken</a>. But that is our business. Please don&#8217;t change the subject.)</p>
<p>Don&#8217;t get me wrong, Patelco, you&#8217;ve been faithful to me, and I appreciate it. You&#8217;ve given me 1% back on every dollar I charged to you over the years. For that I thank you.</p>
<p>But then there are the fees. <strong><em>Late fees?</em></strong> I am sorry I am <em>not</em> that kind of man. You blame me for being late. And I was a few times. But let&#8217;s be fair, you had a part to play in this too. I <em>want</em> to give you your full balance every month. &#8220;Just take it&#8221; I said to your customer service reps, &#8220;<strong>Automatically deduct</strong> the right amount from my bank account every month so I don&#8217;t have to think about it.&#8221; But no, you refused. It&#8217;s as if you have some twisted control issues. You like making me come to you every month, don&#8217;t you? Yes, I am human, I am bound to forget sometimes. BOOM, you never fail to smack me with late fees. After all we&#8217;ve been through!!</p>
<p>News flash, Patelco: You may not be that type of financial institution to <strong>take my money automatically</strong>, but there are plenty of others who are. Smack on time, month after month. No complaining. No work on my part. It&#8217;s been going on for years and yes we&#8217;re both very satisfied.</p>
<p>And Patelco? I don&#8217;t mean to kick you when you are down, but the <strong>other bank websites just look and feel better</strong>. Even frumpy <a href="http://www.wamu.com/">Washington Mutual</a> recently had some work done and suddenly looks five years younger. You could too, but you just don&#8217;t.</p>
<p>Patelco, it&#8217;s time to look inwards and ask what YOU should be doing to attract people like me.</p>
<p>I am sorry, my mind is made up. After fifteen years it is time for us to make a clean break and move on.</p>
<p>Good luck, Patelco. Thank you for the good memories. I hope you can grow through this experience and become a better credit union for your other members.</p>
<p>Best wishes,<br />
- Philip</p>
]]></content:encoded>
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		<title>Marriage Sav-R Toothpaste Tube</title>
		<link>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/standing-toothpaste/</link>
		<comments>http://stealthisidea.com/articles/standing-toothpaste/#comments</comments>
		<pubDate>Tue, 17 May 2005 07:34:23 +0000</pubDate>
		<dc:creator>Philip Haine</dc:creator>
				<category><![CDATA[Great Designs]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Humor]]></category>
		<category><![CDATA[Product Design]]></category>

		<guid isPermaLink="false">http://stealthisidea.com/articles/18/</guid>
		<description><![CDATA[It's always nice seeing breakthrough solutions to mundane old problems that we accept as a given.]]></description>
			<content:encoded><![CDATA[<p>There are many minor annoyances in life that we tolerate and accept as a given. But it turns out that despite years of low-level irritation, it turns out there was a viable solution all along.</p>
<p>One example is the toothpaste tube, the proverbial source of marriage friction. Who knew such tensions could have been avoided all along?</p>
<p>The solution is the <strong>stand-up toothpaste tube</strong>.</p>
<p><img src="/wp-content/standing-toothpaste/standing-toothpaste.jpg" alt="Standing tube of toothpaste" /> <img src="/wp-content/standing-toothpaste/open-toothpaste.jpg" alt="Toothpaste tube with flip-open cap" /></p>
<p>Let&#8217;s look at the <a href="/articles/ssnifs/">SSNiF scenarios</a>:</p>
<table class="texttable" border="0" width="100%">
<tbody>
<tr>
<th scope="col">Stakeholder</th>
<th scope="col">Situation</th>
<th scope="col">Need</th>
<th scope="col">Feature</th>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Your spouse</td>
<td>Too  important to put the cap back on. Toothpaste crusts<br />
at the opening.</p>
<p>Sometimes &#8220;loses&#8221; cap entirely, in the same way that last Thursday&#8217;s plans were &#8220;forgotten.&#8221;</td>
<td rowspan="2">A way to prevent crusty toothpaste from ruining an otherwise wonderful<br />
marriage.</td>
<td rowspan="2">• Cap is attached to the tube so it can&#8217;t be lost.</p>
<p>• Cap flips on and off; no laborious screwing of the toothpaste cap.</td>
</tr>
<tr class="evenrow">
<td>You</td>
<td>Can&#8217;t stand  crusty toothpaste. Is it too much to ask to simply put the retchid lid back on after using?</td>
</tr>
<tr>
<td>Your spouse</td>
<td>Too thoughtless or lazy to squeeze from the end of the toothpaste tube.<br />
Toothpaste gathers at the wrong end of the toothpaste tube.</td>
<td rowspan="2">A way to streamline the extraction of toothpaste, without unduly burdening the overworked and under-appreciated significant other.</td>
<td rowspan="2">• Tube stands upright with opening at the bottom.</p>
<p>• Lower viscosity of toothpaste collects at the bottom, near the opening.</td>
</tr>
<tr class="evenrow">
<td>You</td>
<td>Guess who has to pick up the slack yet again, by painstakingly squeezing<br />
the toothpaste back to the opening?</td>
</tr>
</tbody>
</table>
<p>I love this sort of solution, because it&#8217;s something that could have been done years ago, but wasn&#8217;t. The need was there, the technology was there, but something intangible was missing: the framing of the problem, the inspiration for solving it, the vision to make a product out of it or the courage to go against the industry norm.</p>
<p>If you are interested in this product, it can be hard to find in the real world, despite tracts of supermarket shelf space devoted to every conceivable permutation of toothpaste feature. You can pick up a tube or two at <a href="http://www.amazon.com/gp/redirect.html?ie=UTF8&amp;location=http%3A%2F%2Fwww.amazon.com%2FColgate-Cavity-Protection-Toothpaste-Regular%2Fdp%2FB000GGG0YI%3Fie%3DUTF8%26s%3Dhpc%26qid%3D1181185305%26sr%3D1-2&amp;tag=stealthisidea-20&amp;linkCode=ur2&amp;camp=1789&amp;creative=9325">Amazon</a>.</p>
<p>And may toothpaste keep us together, til death do us part.</p>
<p>This tootpaste tube articles is a facetious example of <a href="/articles/ssnifs/">SSNiF Scenarios</a> &#8212; little user stories that are expressed in terms of Stakeholder, Situation and Need.  If you are interested in this technique, other articles that demonstrate it: <a href="/articles/email-encryption/">Who Read Your Email This Morning?</a>, <a href="/articles/hosted-vs-local/">Hosted vs. Local Applications</a> and <a href="/articles/encrypted-wifi/">Open, yet encrypted Wi-Fi</a>.</p>
<p><em>[Update 8/21/08 - changed the old name "USN use cases" to "<a href="/articles/ssnifs/">SSNiF Scenarios</a>"]</em></p>
]]></content:encoded>
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